What? Hit My Sister? and other junk

When I first started derby, I couldn't figure out how to get through years of aggression counseling to bring myself to hit another human being...that I wasn't even necessarily angry with....even when they would hit me first!

MOAB and I had many discussions early on about this conundrum. How DO you hit these girls you have grown to know and love like family? Generally girls aren't raised to show aggression in this way. We cry, clean, go for a run, go retail therapy and the like. But HIT? WHAT?

And it's not just hitting correctly either...it's just hitting, bumping, hip checking, booty blocking, marking someone up...

We finally realized that we would RATHER have our sisters hitting us and us hitting them in return (to learn how to give and take) than learning it the hard way: in the midst of a scrimmage or bout against other girls who could give two shits less about us at the time. Girls whose main goal was to knock us down and win. It was better to receive pain and bruises out of love than out of competition.

So having properly psychoanalyzed the whole issue, next it was time for us to put it into motion. Poor MOAB cried the first several times. Because....well...MOAB has a soft heart...but a VERY hard hit! So it kind of evens her out.

Me? I still couldn't get past the mental block. Even when Demanda Chaos and EM-80 where knocking the CRAP outta me to get me to hit (I had bruises on TOP OF bruises) I still just couldn't bring myself to do it!

What finally DID get me to hit (albeit not very well)? Elbow MacPhearson. Sweet Elbow. The nicest, sweetest gal you will ever meet. That is UNTIL she gets on the track! Then you can only hope and pray she is on your team when you are scrimmaging in practice. Because she is a bulldog! And don't even get me started on those sharp-ass shoulders of hers!

We were scrimmaging in practice one fine evening when we used to skate at the Val Air Ballroom (shout out to Chewi!). Elbow was Pivot, I was her 2 and the other team (MOAB and co) was all over us! That's when that sweet, sweet Elbow turned back to look at me. I was scared. Gone was the dimples and fresh face I had grown to know. In its place was a snarl. Her eyes were set and looked like laser beams could start shooting out of them at any time. Her posture was that of a jungle cat getting ready to pounce on it's prey. She then growled these three words that I will never forget, "F*%$ing HIT SOMEBODY!"

I meekly thought "okay" and drove my shoulder into whoever was on my right. Then I skated up next to Elbow and looked at her, awaiting my next instruction from the Master aka Elbow.

Seeing her getting pummeled and ganged up on and realizing that I was responsible for part of it, made me also realize that I NEEDED to learn to hit in some fashion. Or else block really well. Something. Because otherwise, my team would not be able to count on me. And then I would essentially be an empty uniform out there. Skating for myself alone. And what purpose would that serve? I may as well just not play roller derby and just spend my time going to open skate, right? Right!

So the other night when some of the fresh meat (possibly my little derby sister, Cassie) mentioned the hitting conundrum to me, I shared some of these insights with her.

So go out there and hit a bitch! Before Elbow pounces on you!